Relate Well! Blog

Addressing the all-important and often perplexing topics and issues related to enhancing your personal growth and professional development

10 Common Leadership Mistakes

Leading is challenging enough without becoming your own worst enemy and  having to deal with the potential negative fallout associated with the 10 common leadership mistakes listed below. Take a moment and ask yourself if you might fall prey to one or more of these mistakes. If so, identify some action steps that will help you avoid these potential pitfalls in the future.

  1. Making yourself scarce

Workers appreciate a visible leader – someone who takes a personal interest in the work that’s being done by making it a priority to get to know those who are doing it. Make sure you always have an open door policy that is more than just talk or a print you hang on the wall.

  1. Allowing the vision to fade

Good leaders make it a priority to keep the vision of the organization fresh and focused. The consistent presence of a well-defined vision provides motivation, enthusiasm and purpose for those responsible for carrying it out. Live your vision, don’t just talk about...

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Keys to Confronting Well - Part II

In last week’s blog I shared the first five of ten keys to confronting well. Have you had an opportunity to practice those principles in a confrontation? If so, let us know in the comments below!

Confrontation can be a scary proposition, but when you learn to do it well it can be the key to resolving differences and strengthening trust in your relationships.  Here are the last five keys to confronting well.

  1. Express your thoughts and feelings

Expressing what you feel openly and honestly at the outset of a difficult conversation will help to reduce anxiety and diffuse pent up emotion that might otherwise escalate during the discussion. For example, stating, “I am angry” will actually help prevent anger from controlling your responses.

  1. Remember that it’s far better to be respected than to be liked

Although the person you are confronting may not like what you have to say, if you appropriately communicate your concerns, they are much more likely to...

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Keys to Confronting Well - Part I

Many people struggle with confronting well. The thought of speaking up, especially during a conflict or uncomfortable situation, can be almost paralyzing. However, the ability to effectively confront tough issues by clearly stating what you think, feel, and want can be one of the most valuable interpersonal skills a person can possess.

This week we will look at the first five of the ten keys to confronting well so you can be prepared for those difficult conversations.

  1. Objectively describe your concern

Stick to the facts only when describing your concern or complaint. If you begin by talking about the other person’s motives or intentions, you’re likely to trigger a defensive or angry reaction.

  1. Avoid making it personal

Address the action or behavior without attacking the person with criticism, name calling or blame. Negative personal comments can damage your relationship, even into the future.

  1. Keep your comments brief and to the point

Reserve the lectures for the...

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Time Killers at the Office

Labor Day got me thinking about how the concept of work has changed over the years. I respect and applaud men and women who work with their hands in trades and services, especially because so much of the work being done today is in an office environment. That is where our focus is today, but even if you are a craftsman or laborer, you will find some benefit in these recommendations.

Do you want to improve your performance and get more done at work? If you’re an honest, hard-working employee, manager or executive your answer is probably “yes”.  In my consultations with executive coaching clients, working smarter, streamlining efficiency and increasing productivity are nearly always included in their primary goals.  So one tool we use regularly is a list of time killers at the office.  This list is comprised of activities that on the surface seem harmless or even important, but in reality can greatly undermine the quality and quantity of work we...

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How to Keep Your Best Employees

During a recent executive coaching session the topic of employee turnover came up. My client shared what has been an ongoing problem in his company: losing star performers. Recognizing the tremendous expense associated with recruiting, hiring and training as well as losses in production and efficiency, he wanted to know what his company could do keep their best employees.

In addition to the obvious factors of competitive benefits and salaries, here are some of the key strategies to help you keep your best employees:

 

1. Regularly acknowledge their accomplishments and contributions.

2. Make sure they stay positively challenged and stretched.

3. Frequently revisit your vision and mission with genuine enthusiasm and passion.

4. Groom them for greater responsibility.

5. Give them regular feedback along with clear suggestions for improvement.

6. Empower them and then stay out of their way. When Lincoln appointed General Ulysses S. Grant as commander of the Union armies in...

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How to Write a Personal Mission Statement

For years, I have been assisting men and women in their effort to clarify the purpose and direction they want for their lives. One of the tools I have encouraged them to use in this process is the Personal Mission Statement.

You have likely heard the widely-quoted statement that if you write down your goals you significantly improve your chances of accomplishing them.  This principle reinforces the value of creating a written personal mission statement to help you become who you want to be and accomplish what you want to do.

Over the years, I have gathered information from many sources on creating a personal mission statement and want to share some of that information with you.

The challenge is to write your mission statement in such a way that it will be effective, so while there is no required format or formula, the following guidelines may be helpful:

Keep it simple, clear and brief. The best mission statements tend to be three to five sentences long. Identify the area...

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9 Ways You May Be Holding Your Business Back

I want to thank Brad Mishlove, CEO and founder of Catapult Groups, for providing our guest blog post for today. I’m confident you will find his insights to be very valuable in helping you move your business forward.

Live, Work, and Relate Well!

Dr. Todd

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If you own a business, it’s time to take your blinders off so you can identify any problems that may be holding you and your business back.

As a business owner, one of the costliest mistakes you can make is not knowing your blind spots. You worked hard to grow your business, and you have faith in your product.

Surveys have shown that 75% of small business owners have an optimistic outlook toward their company’s future, but the numbers don’t bear out this enthusiasm. The truth is, 70% of small businesses will fail by the tenth year, with a full 20% failing within the first year.

What’s holding your business back?

Despite feeling optimistic in the beginning, these...

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Top Performers Use Executive Coaching

Behind every world-class athlete is a dedicated and committed coach. The same can be said for many of the top performing leaders, executives, professionals, directors, managers, pastors and entrepreneurs. If you are serious about achieving and accomplishing greater results and embracing all you are capable of becoming you will want to experience the proven power of executive coaching.

Generally speaking, those who take advantage of executive coaching are success minded, goal directed and performance driven. They may have already experienced an impressive amount of professional success in their life, but desire to maximize their potential even further by creating greater balance, clearer focus and a fresh perspective.

Clearly, when executives and other professionals experience the benefits of coaching it often has a ripple effect throughout the organization, improving morale, retention, efficiency, and productivity.  According to a Manchester, Inc. survey of 100 executives,...

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Six Tips for Conducting a Great Interview

Here’s some great interviewing tips from my friend and colleague, David Towne.

Business travel. It used to be such a glamorous thought. New places. Restaurants. Hotel rooms. Jumping on the bed when no one is looking. Impressing people by telling them all the places you have traveled or are traveling. But now that I am older and somewhat seasoned in travel, it has lost much of its appeal.

I just got home from Parker, Colorado where I was screening candidates for a new school. Many interviews in the lobby of the hotel and a few lessons learned.

Don’t eat too much bacon at breakfast or you will crash in the middle of an interview at 11:15am.

If you don’t start with Attention Deficit Disorder at the beginning of the day, you will have it after eight hours of interviews.

The more you drink, the more you will have to excuse yourself during interviews!

Seriously, after years of asking people questions, I have a few tips that have helped me in interviewing that I would...

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"But I Don't Like Confrontation"

Wouldn’t it be nice if everyone always got along and communication was always agreeable? That, of course, is a fantasy that will never happen as long as human beings co-exist on Earth. The reality is that there are times when discussions must take place that involve disagreement or confrontation of a behavior or situation that needs to change, whether you like it or not. You may know someone who enjoys a good argument or seems to relish stirring up discussion about difficult subjects, but that doesn’t describe most people. It is more likely that you would rather run the other direction – and you are not alone!

I would have to say that fear of confrontation is one of the most common issues many of my clients face. It’s not uncommon for people to literally become sick to their stomachs at the thought of having to confront for fear of having it turn into a conflict or facing the possibility of rejection. Consequently, these same people often experience low...

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