Valentine's Day: Celebrating an Everyday Love

Valentine’s Day is the day that sweethearts and spouses celebrate romance and give gifts to one another to prove their love. And according to jewelry, fragrance and candy companies, you better go big or go home… alone. It often seems like designating one day a year for declaring and expressing love puts a lot of pressure on people.

I enjoy Valentine’s Day, actually, because my wife and I celebrate our anniversary at the same time. For us, Valentine’s Day is a celebration of the whole previous year of our marriage, in which we worked together, hammered out disagreements together, parented (and grand-parented) together, prayed together, laughed and played together and helped one another through the days when one of us was sick, tired, or grouchy. For us, Valentine’s Day is a fresh, new year of growing closer to one another and facing the daily grind together.

The couples that concern me, however, are the ones that place too high a value on that one big day and expect that something magical will happen on February 14^th if they spend enough money on a gift. The reality is that one special date cannot take the place of daily faithfulness, consideration or affection. A year of selfishness cannot be fixed by chocolate and a habit of disregarding a partner’s needs cannot be wiped out by a bottle of perfume, no matter how expensive.

True love is a commitment to selflessness and a decision to stay even when it doesn’t feel good. It’s putting someone else’s needs and feelings above your own and being willing to be vulnerable. It would be hard to define love any better than the apostle Paul did in his letter to the Corinthians. “Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.” (NLT)

If February 14^th is a special day for you, I hope you enjoy it with your sweetheart. But even if you have a low-key celebration, don’t let the day end without a commitment to keep your love strong every day of the year.

Live, Work and Relate Well!

Dr. Todd